The Importance of Feelings

Getting to do the family wisdom post this week made me think. Family is SO wonderful. But why am I sometimes the worst person around the people I love the most, and the people who love me most? This doesn’t make sense in my head or heart, but it still comes out in my actions. It frustrates me every time I do it. But it still happens. It has not happened in awhile, but I remember the times I really struggled with holding my feelings, emotions, and struggles and letting that get in the way of showing love. The affect always came out the worst around my family. Family is such a wonderful gift. Hopefully, certain people in your family love you no matter what. And that is a relationship to cherish.

So here are my thoughts. I often get caught up in feeling one way, but expressing another.  I either justify not letting my emotions show, try to let them out slowly or patiently, or stuff them as far down as I can get them. But that is just a ticking bomb waiting to explode. It either explodes into a whole tornado of that one emotion, an overwhelming confusion of a variety of emotions, or evolves into a bitter resentment.  Feelings are there.  Whether right or wrong, truth or lies, joy or sorrow, they exist.

So rather than run away from those feelings.  Recognize them.  We cannot control our feelings or emotions all the time.  But we can control how we deal with them, let go of them, or act upon them.  This doesn’t mean they are justified or right.  But acknowledge they are there and then appropriately process through what caused them, and what to do with them.  Are those feelings a first reaction, are they caused by pent up frustration, or is there a valid reason to feel as you do?  These are the things I need to ask myself.  Knowing that it is okay to feel.  Not only is it okay, but I need to be aware of where my heart soul and mind are.  Running from feelings, emotion, and your heart runs towards a dead end.  So what do i do when I want to run?

I often find myself using the word “fine”… What does that mean?  Is it really okay? Or am I just saying its okay because I don’t want to get into it now?  Am I trying to convince myself its okay when the feelings are there that it is really not?  Fine… (according to Italian Job) means Freaked out Insecure Neurotic and Emotional.  Not that I completely agree with this… Sometimes “fine” is a fine word… but too often I use it as a scapegoat.  It isn’t fine. Is it good, bad, in between, still processing through it, trying to get over it, or just hard?? All of those are better answers than FINE.  Fine is often the answer to how are you doing today.  It is quite interesting to see people flinch or take a step back if you really get into how you are doing.  They asked didn’t they… So I encourage you, take a minute to assess where your emotions are, how are you really feeling?  I am not telling you it is okay to be mad or angry, to be hurt or sad, but something is causing that.  What is the root of that emotion.  Figure it out, process through it, and be more than Fine.

We were created for something great.  God can make extraordinary out of ordinary.  So let’s know who we are.  Let’s know what drives us.  Let’s know what bothers us.  Let’s know how we feel.  Let’s be aware of how that affects us.  Some feelings are welcomed.  Others need to be given over to the Lord in prayer.  Surrender.  God already knows our thoughts anyway.  So why don’t we let Him reveal to us who we are in Him, not who we are-wrapped up in ourselves.  Recognize your emotions, but also recognize the Lord in your heart, soul, and mind, and seek Him to see what He is doing in your life.

Hebrews 4:12-13

“For the word of God is alive and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart. Nothing in all creation is hidden from God’s sight. Everything is uncovered and laid bare before the eyes of him to whom we must give account.”

Takeaway for the week: Think before you act. Let someone close to you in to your life a little bit more. Let them love you and express your love to them.