A new “arrival”
There are all these milestones in life that have this stigma of “once I get there, my life will be complete”. “Once I turn whatever age, I will have it all figured out.” “Once I get my license I will be free” “Once I finish school, I will have more time” “Once I can fit into this size, I will feel good” “Once I get married, life will be perfect” and the list goes on and on and on. I am sure you can think of a few times in life where you have felt that way.
What I have realized, we will never “arrive” as the world puts it. Life is never complete. We will never be finished growing, changing, learning, adapting, and developing. Some of you may think this is very disappointing. You may have been waiting for that promotion, or that location change, or that next vacation time to reach euphoria. But let me let you in on a little secret, once you get there, it will be something else. The success of this world is just this never ending mirage of making you feel fulfilled. You will still be empty. It is great when you are blessed by something like a house. But once you have the house, there is the pet, or the boat, or the remodeling… That is just the impression the world puts out there. So there’s this push to arrive at some place. And once you get there, there is no satisfaction, just wanting more. It’s a rough road down that path.
But you don’t have to feel like this. There is more to life. There is more to who you are. It is not about what you do or what you have. It is about who you are. But I have seen the arrival battle touch on the sense of self worth also. Many put alot of stress on their social status, their relationships with others, their image, or the approval of others. Arrival can put a pressure on people to impress others, put on a facade to have the perfect life, or make struggles be pushed under the rug to try to subtly make them go away… But we know this never works. The truth will seep its way out…
So, the other part of never arriving to discuss is we always have to be willing to grow and change with the waves of life. Let me use the example of marriage. There was this part of me that thought getting married was the tip top of life experiences. Don’t get me wrong, it is wonderful in so many ways, but it is a step into the journey of doing life together. Life is not going to be perfect. Life is not going to be easy. But it is all worth it. The arrival just brings you to this point where you learn how to do life with someone else. There is the honeymoon phase and all that where you live in this bliss of love for a little bit. But when you come back to earth you realize, oh wait I am the same impatient and imperfect person that I was before. How can I let this person see my true colors and have him still love me? That’s just it… Be real. And never think you are done saying I am sorry, forgiving someone else, being honest, being broken, and encouraging one another through a struggle.
One of my favorite verses from the Bible is Philippians 1:6, which says “being confident of this, that he who began a good work in us will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus”. So whether you believe in the Bible as I do or not, there is a good life lesson here. We are all works in progress. So give yourself a little slack in trying to figure this life out. Which means, also give others a little room to grow and learn. And be a part of that process. Another Bible verse, James 1:2-4 states, “Consider it pure joy my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.” So I believe that persevering through this life, one day, when I get to spend eternity in heaven with my Father, there I will be complete. There I will have arrived, to be completely who I was created to be and where I was created to be. But until then, I will keep pressing on!
When have you thought “Finally, I have arrived”. And what happened when that arrival was not what you expected?
