Daddy Dates-Mommy Dates

Daddy dates are a hot topic these days, especially in reference to the importance of a father establishing a solid relationship with his daughters.   Dad’s focused attention provides security and a healthy sense of self for daughters as they grow into young women. Focus on the Family had a great radio program the other day about Daddy Dates. You can check out their website for more information and a list of resources.
“http://www.focusonthefamily.com/parenting/parenting_roles/fatherhood/a_date_with_dad.aspx”>http://www.focusonthefamily.com/parenting/parenting_roles/fatherhood/a_date_with_dad.aspx

My favorite quote from the article states, “The bond you develop with your daughter during real times of conversation and connection pays dividends.” (Lynne Thompson)

I totally agree with this premise. In our family’s experience, my husband’s willingness to participate in many aspects of our daughters’ lives has helped develop them into the balanced, passionate and strong women they are today. With his busy schedule actual one-on-one regular dating each of our 4 daughters was not always a realistic possibility so he participated in their lives by coaching their sports teams. He occasionally took them shopping and to the movies or to father daughter events at their school, but he spent hours and hours of time helping them develop into fantastic athletes-practicing at all hours of the day or night. He devoted all his free time to our family and we all appreciated his willingness to put aside his total exhaustion to spend time being a great husband and dad. Our girls have called him Poppa their entire lives and since this was not the normal name most of their friends called their own dads-he became Poppa Rick or Poppa Weisser to all their friends and teammates.

 I also strongly believe that Dads should date their sons as well. Our first grandchild is a “full of energy and excited about life” BOY!!  We call him “the leader of the pack” since he has two younger brothers and one younger sister and two younger girl cousins and he is only 4. Early on, his dad started taking him on “Man Dates”. My husband (Poppa) and his other grandpa (Grandpi) have joined in the fun and they take him on “Man Dates” as well. He is only 4 but most of his favorite memories are spending one-on-one time with his dad, Grampi or Poppa. He is passionate about trains, so most of the “Man Date” time at this stage includes trips to the local train station to watch the trains, or excursions to Irvine Park to ride the miniature train.

 Kids spell love “T-I-M-E” so encourage your husband to pencil in time with your kids before he fills his monthly calendar up with all the urgent “have to dos”.

One of the best bits of wisdom a friend gave me early on was to carve out time to spend with each of my daughters one-on-one as well. So I made sure to try to have private time with each of the girls regularly. With our busy lives, I had to be creative to get alone time with each daughter. also used coaching and practicing sports, carpooling to music lessons or youth group to catch up on their day and talk about what was going on in their lives. I volunteered to drive to every field trip, extra-curricular and sporting event just so I could meet all their friends. I made sure to have snacks and water for all.

So now that both moms and dads have their Daddy Date and Mommy Date assignments, remember to use your DATE time wisely and when you get the privilege of spending one-on-one time with a child, LISTEN!!! Do not use that time to lecture or discipline them. Ask interesting questions and really LISTEN! Make it a goal to be a HERO to your kids.

Here are the aunties and uncles practicing with their niece and nephews for when they get to have Daddy Dates and Mommy Dates with their own kids!

 What are you favorite ways to spend time with your kids?

What are the best activities you have done with your kids on dates.