Attitude Adjustment

I love when a friend shares something on social media that I really need to hear. A few days ago, a friend posted an article titled, “6 Ways Changing My Perspective Helped Stop My Kid’s Tantrums.” I almost didn’t read it, but lately I’ve been feeling helpless during my own kid’s tantrums. I’m so glad I took the time to read this blog because it was so helpful!

What really got me from the start was her quote, “It wasn’t until I changed my reaction to his tantrums and realized my job was to teach him how to calm himself that his tantrums ended.” I knew my anger during the tantrums was not helping, but gosh, silly tantrums make me angry! Especially in the car! There is nowhere for me to hide.

Here 6 tips were so simple, and just what I needed to hear. One of my favorite lines from her blog states, “My son needs to know I love him no matter what and not feel like he’s a bad kid for freaking out.”

I tried some of her tips today during not one, but TWO major tantrums. Two tantrums plus my pregnancy insomnia, girls waking up an hour early, and many other mini meltdowns would have normally been a recipe for quite the angry mom. But you know what? I didn’t yell or get angry. NOT ONCE!

The tantrums were pretty long and pretty loud, but I clearly saw how my attitude and my perspective influenced the duration and outcome of the tantrums. My daughter calmed down all on her own. By the second tantrum she said “sorry” all on her own. I ignored the screaming, kicking, throwing things and came up with positive ways to let her have space and calm herself down rather than telling her to “stop.” I saw how clearly my own attitude was fueling the fire during her tantrums in the stark differences of her tantrums today.

I really appreciated the perspective from this blog post and hope you find it helpful. I have also started reading “Grace Based Parenting” by Tim Kimmel. I am only two chapters in, but I am so excited about this book already. How can I not be excited about a book that has a forward by Max Lucado stating, “Tim knows families. And he knows how to help ours. Tim helps us grasp what it is our children need most from us. And, just as importantly, he gives us practical, good-sense ways to give our children the security of unconditional, grace-filled love. In doing so, Tim helps us give our children the greatest gift: a heart that yearns for God.

Do yourself and your family a favor. Read this book.”

What are your favorite parenting books? What has helped you when your child has a tantrum?